View Full Version : Chuck Norris....
wagonwheelfestival
08-24-2010, 09:53 AM
http://crossfitmaximus.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/chuck_norris.jpg
Ok, so whats a forum without a Chuck Norris thread... haha... came across some of them today... crack me up! lol
•*Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
• Chuck Norris can parallel park a freight train
• There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
LOL...
LITTLE BITTY
08-24-2010, 11:09 AM
everybody wears superman pajamas......superman wears chuck norris' pajamas
Raquellita
08-24-2010, 11:28 AM
Interesting
Chevgirl357
08-24-2010, 11:43 AM
Love these! There are actual websites for this stuff. Go and google: Find Chuck Norris and then click on the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button (not the link that pops up that SAYS I'm feeling lucky). It's awesome!!
WillieCash
08-24-2010, 12:49 PM
Chuck should emcee WWF
deegee83
08-24-2010, 01:33 PM
Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands, and now they are just called the Islands.
wagonwheelfestival
08-24-2010, 01:43 PM
Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands, and now they are just called the Islands.
LOL,... now thats good
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 08:26 AM
http://www.tinyjoke.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/chuck-norris.jpg
WillieCash
08-25-2010, 12:23 PM
I hear Chuck Norris invented the pedal steel because he knew learning to play guitar wouldn't pose a challenge to him.
He then went on to become the greatest pedal steel player the world has ever known in the same afternoon.
Chevgirl357
08-25-2010, 01:01 PM
I hear Chuck Norris invented the pedal steel because he knew learning to play guitar wouldn't pose a challenge to him.
He then went on to become the greatest pedal steel player the world has ever known in the same afternoon.
Ummm....are you getting these from a website? Cuz I'm not sure I'm getting the punchline....
WillieCash
08-25-2010, 01:07 PM
I guess it's only funny if you know how much more difficult it is to play pedal steel than regular guitar.
Even then... it may not be that funny.
uscpsycho
08-25-2010, 01:24 PM
I guess it's only funny if you know how much more difficult it is to play pedal steel than regular guitar.
Even then... it may not be that funny.
Even then, not funny.
But that's odd, pedal steel always looked easier to me than regular.
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 01:24 PM
I guess it's only funny if you know how much more difficult it is to play pedal steel than regular guitar.
Even then... it may not be that funny.
The fact that you followed it up with an explanation was the funny part! haha... =) Hey anything Chuck Norris is good!
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 01:24 PM
http://crossfitasia.com/ChuckNorris.jpg
WillieCash
08-25-2010, 01:27 PM
Even then, not funny.
But that's odd, pedal steel always looked easier to me than regular.
Pedal Steel is WAY harder. It's like playing guitar leads and tap dancing at the same time.
Any yokel can learn a few guitar chords, but you need to know music theory on the fly to play pedal.
Many more strings and no chords, all scales.
Plus there are the pedals you work with your feel and levers you push with your knees all at once.
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 01:39 PM
http://www.lotustalk.com/forums/attachments/f68/101071d1226267651-chuck-norris-jokes-imageschuck-2dnorris-2dguns-2dcarry-2dhim.jpg
Raquellita
08-25-2010, 01:45 PM
Love these! There are actual websites for this stuff. Go and google: Find Chuck Norris and then click on the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button (not the link that pops up that SAYS I'm feeling lucky). It's awesome!!
That was TOO funny!
KittyLeigh
08-25-2010, 02:07 PM
Love these! There are actual websites for this stuff. Go and google: Find Chuck Norris and then click on the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button (not the link that pops up that SAYS I'm feeling lucky). It's awesome!!
hahaha!
I wonder if the Dos Equis commercials for "the most interesting man...in the world" were inspired by these....
Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Raquellita
08-25-2010, 02:09 PM
I just don't get it. I'm more of a Clint Eastwood kinda gal. hehehe
uscpsycho
08-25-2010, 02:12 PM
Pedal Steel is WAY harder. It's like playing guitar leads and tap dancing at the same time.
Any yokel can learn a few guitar chords, but you need to know music theory on the fly to play pedal.
Many more strings and no chords, all scales.
Plus there are the pedals you work with your feel and levers you push with your knees all at once.
You calling me a yokel? You don't want me to go all Chuck Norris on your ass do you???
I had no idea there was so much going on under the hood. I'll stick to the geetar.
Chevgirl357
08-25-2010, 02:23 PM
I just don't get it. I'm more of a Clint Eastwood kinda gal. hehehe
I used to love me some Walker, Texas Ranger!
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 02:39 PM
I used to love me some Walker, Texas Ranger!
My best friends name is Brian Walker... so as you can imagine I've been calling him Brian Walker, Texas Ranger for some time now, hahaha... makes for an awful long name though.. hahaha Still makes me laugh though! lol
wagonwheelfestival
08-25-2010, 02:41 PM
THE TOP TEN CHUCK NORRIS FACTS:
01. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
04. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
05. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
06. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
07. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
08. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
09. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
10. A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
WillieCash
08-25-2010, 02:42 PM
You calling me a yokel? You don't want me to go all Chuck Norris on your ass do you???
I had no idea there was so much going on under the hood. I'll stick to the geetar.
Implying you can go Chuck Norris on anybody's ass when you aren't Chuck Norris makes him appear and go Chuck Norris all over your ass. Be warned!
I'm a total yokel too. My guitar playing can most kindly be referred to as "musical abuse".
I just don't get it. I'm more of a Clint Eastwood kinda gal. hehehe
Just an FYI...if you want to spot Clint Eastwood just go see a Jamie Cullum concert, he's a Cullum stalker too. Seen Clint at his last two L.A. concerts this year alone.
Chevgirl357
08-26-2010, 07:38 AM
Just an FYI...if you want to spot Clint Eastwood just go see a Jamie Cullum concert, he's a Cullum stalker too. Seen Clint at his last two L.A. concerts this year alone.
My kid's Dad works on Clint Eastwood's house (building a theater in his house) up in...crap, what city is it? It's up North somewhere. Anyhow, he's been there a couple times.
Raquellita
08-26-2010, 08:24 AM
My kid's Dad works on Clint Eastwood's house (building a theater in his house) up in...crap, what city is it? It's up North somewhere. Anyhow, he's been there a couple times.
Carmel
Raquellita
08-26-2010, 08:25 AM
Just an FYI...if you want to spot Clint Eastwood just go see a Jamie Cullum concert, he's a Cullum stalker too. Seen Clint at his last two L.A. concerts this year alone.
Nice! Now if only I knew who Jamie Cullum is.......:(
Chevgirl357
08-26-2010, 09:15 AM
Carmel
Why couldn't I think of that??? LOL, yes, it's Carmel.
Nice! Now if only I knew who Jamie Cullum is.......:(
#1 Jazz musician in Britian (from London). You may know him from the Grand Tarino song for the movie and he did a remake of everlasting love for Bridget Jones Diary theme song. You can youtube him...unbelievable piano player.
I CHEAT on Country Music :eek::eek::eek:
Raquellita
08-26-2010, 11:25 AM
Thanks Rose....I will look him up.
KittyLeigh
08-30-2010, 04:24 PM
hahahaha - one of my students had this posted on her Facebook, thought of this thread....made me laugh...
Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
wagonwheelfestival
08-31-2010, 09:44 AM
hahahaha - one of my students had this posted on her Facebook, thought of this thread....made me laugh...
Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
LOL.. I never heard that one... now I'm laughing... haha
wagonwheelfestival
08-31-2010, 09:45 AM
TODAY'S CHUCK NORRIS FACT!!!
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
wagonwheelfestival
08-31-2010, 09:46 AM
AND A FOLLOW UP!!! LOL
Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".